What a dilemma! First of I am sorry for you loss and I pray that you will be comforted along with all other mourners, and that you will know no more sorrow.
Here is a quick analysis of the dilemma and what I suggest you do. There is a mitzvah to honor one’s parent even after the parent departs this world. However, there is also a mitzvah to honor one’s wife greatly. In the words of our Sages: “A husband should love his wife as much as he loves himself, and he should honor her even more than he honors himself.”
Unless your situation entails a compelling reason to stay at home, I suggest you speak with your wife about the decision you need to make. If she supports your being away for the day or days needed to travel for your mother’s funeral — that is what you should do. But if your wife wants you to stay nearby for her peace of mind, despite her understanding your natural desire to go to the funeral, you should stay with your wife.
And whatever you decide to do after speaking with your wife, you should do whole-heartedly and without any feeling of regret. Under no circumstances should a person resent his wife for preventing him from going, nor resent his mother for being buried on the day his wife gives birth! Despite all the emotions and turmoil in your life right now, I pray that God will help guide you and your wife to make the correct decision for you both, and may your wife have an easy birth to a child who will bring comfort and happiness to your family for many long and good years to come.
