Every person should show warmth and pleasantness in his home, especially towards his family and friends. Of course there are times to be more “serious” and act more “businesslike” but a person should always show the appropriate love and respect needed in every situation.
A parent who displays warmth and pleasantness in the home and creates a “homey” atmosphere will earn the respect of the spouse and children. Children who see that their parents are happy will desire to emulate them. This may be the best form of education to teach family values and fulfill the parents’ “prayer” that their children grow up to be well-adjusted, moral and upright individuals. Even when one has to show one’s more serious and responsible side this does not contradict or diminish the benefits gained by being generally easy-going and even somewhat “childish” as necessary.
There is a fascinating Midrash about our Talmudic Sages seeing a man crawling around on the floor with a branch in his mouth as he played with his child. The rabbis remarked, “When a person has children it’s normal for him to behave as if he has gone mad.”
Rabbeinu Nissim, a renowned Torah scholar and scientist who lived in 14th century Spain, wrote that the parents of small children look forward to Shabbat so that they can play with them. It is clear from these sources that your friend’s father is a smart and good parent and person. His behavior that might be perceived as belittling and lacking honor is in fact a sign of honor and greatness.
