Dear Rabbi(s), I am at a crossroads here and need your advice. We send our children to a private Jewish Day school where we receive financial assistance. For the upcoming year they doubled the tuition for us and after some negotiating have come back with a generous offer of no tuition increase. However, due to the financial recession of the last few years we have incurred much debt and are seeking to pay this off. In addition, one of my daughters has a Bat Mitzvah next year and we hoped to have it in Jerusalem. So, the question is, do we continue to send our child to the Day School and put off paying down our debt for a year or so while saving for Israel, or do we pull our children from the Day school (which would be heartbreaking but maybe financially necessary) in order to pay off debt and save for Israel? What guidance does the Torah have on this issue? Thanks.
I truly empathize with you and the difficulties that you are currently going through. I hope and pray that your financial state will rebound and that you will be able to pay full tuition for your children and still have plenty left over to help others!
Often, parents think that it is enough for a child to be proud of being Jewish and that a strong Jewish education is not a requirement. But pride is not a solid, tangible asset and anything that is not tangible cannot be transferred from one generation to the next easily. If, however, the child goes to a Jewish school and receives a serious Jewish education in a good Jewish environment, the chances of the child being the next link in a chain that dates back well more than over three thousand years is strengthened enormously.
Therefore, I would say that providing a Jewish education for all of your children should be your highest priority. Jewish education is the key to Jewish survival — to build a sound Jewish identity and commitment in order to best prepare them for their future happiness and success.
And if you feel that a Bat Mitzvah in Israel is also an important educational provision for your daughter, I would include that in the primary responsibility of providing a positive Jewish education.
So, what do I think you should do? I think that sending your children to a Jewish school — and making an “educational” Bat Mitzvah in Israel — are higher in priority and more preferable than starting to pay off some of your debt at in the meantime.
May you be guided from Above to make the best decision for yourselves and your children, and may you always merit having much joy and contentment in seeing the good paths that your children follow in life.
-------------------------------------
Thank you Rabbi. We appreciate your advice very much.
It's a pleasure. May you be blessed with immeasurable Jewish joy from your children
